I never once thought that my dad would grow old, get grey hair, and develop all those habits that I used to never understand like morning coffee clutch at the local restaurant. But one day, there it was. I looked at my father and somehow over the course of time, he has grown old. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I believe the same is true for aging. My dad certainly doesn’t think himself as old, even though he just turned 70. I have learned myself that what used to seem old to me, somehow only seems more the “aging process” and not old. I now say to other people “70 isn’t old!” when ten years ago I would have had that person with one foot in the grave.There have been numerous days that I feel so helpless to him now, wishing that I could somehow stop the aging process for him and let his body be as young as his mind. Although I know that isn’t possible, I still wish it could be true. So my mind turns to the ways that I can help him now or knowingly in the future. He knows that he is always welcome in our home for “respite” from the day to day routine or for a more permanent place should he ever need it. But what about up until that time, what happens in the meantime?It was my story and this question that encouraged me to use the skills that I have gathered over my career and put together a sort of “tool box” for other to use who also are asking themselves the same question. We can only do as much as we are allowed to do by the ones we love, and sometimes that means helping them in the most un-intrusive way we can. I have worked with countless patients who want to remain independent and in their own home and who is to blame them for that, but they are at risk everyday of a simple fall that can have catastrophic repercussions. There are a growing amount of resources out there to help the elderly in their day to day tasks and live a safe, independent, and fulfilling quality of life. However, some of the simple little things that families can do for their loved ones cannot be underestimated and don’t require a specialist or specific expertise.Next time you go over to the house or apartment, see how many throw rugs are around on the floor. I know that mom wants the house to look warm and inviting and it keeps the carpet from wearing thin, but throw rugs are one of the largest culprits behind falls in the elderly that I know of. Next, make sure that any railings going up or down stairs are secure. Also, make sure that mom and dad have an appropriate organization system for their medication. Pill boxes that have equal compartments to the number of times they need to take their medications should be purchased. If they take their medication 5 times a day, purchase a pill box that has five compartments for every day of the week. This will make a world of difference to them to know which medications to take when and also eliminates the possibility of medication errors.If you have set up the medications but they can’t remember to take them, schedule medication reminder calls with a reliable company that will call them at the times they are supposed to take their medications. Some companies for example, also have a call reassurance option built into their program that will call an emergency contact person if the scheduled call is not acknowledged. If there is any reason to believe that your loved one may be falling or having acute medical issues, it is imperative to make sure that some type of reassurance system is in place. This could be something like medication reminder calls with reassurance or a life-line system that they wear and can access help if they need to. Either way, you will want to be proactive in your approach toward safety and make sure that help is available when it needs to be.In home options are another valuable resource that cannot be underestimated. In home skilled care is often a critical piece to avoid re-hospitalizations and provide in-home safety assessments. Non-skilled care such as home chore and home care workers are also a wonderful resource. I must however mention that most insurance companies (including Medicare) however will not pay for unskilled workers to help give mom and dad a bath or clean their house and cook meals, so this often needs to be a budgeted expense. Non-the-less, this is an option that is available and can make the difference of a person staying in their home or having to go to an assisted living facility.Lastly, if there are nutritional concerns your local Meals-On-Wheels program is a wonderful program that will deliver meals directly to the home for a very reasonable cost. In addition, this is “another set of eyes” that will be able to visually check on the person during the day to make sure that they are OK. One of the best features about this program is that it delivers fresh, nutritious meals that are often the only meal that older people will eat during the day.It will never be easy to watch your parents get older, but with some simple interventions and pro-active solutions you can have a piece of mind that you have done all you can to ensure their safety in the home. They are easy and inexpensive methods to help you get a better sleep at night and to avoid unnecessary medical emergencies for your loved ones.
Written by Dawn Procter MBA, BA, CSWJuly 23, 2009
