A shower refers to the many good wishes and gifts given to her before her wedding that will help the bride in her married life. It is the modern day replacement of the bridal dowry given by the bride's family in the past during Biblical times found in Genesis 29:18-27 and in Genesis 31:14-15. The bridal shower is a wonderful and joyous time and usually the last chance for the bride and close family and friends to have a warm, intimate and relaxing time together before her marriage.
The first wedding shower dates back to the Dutch around the 16th or 17th century. There was a young girl who fell in love with a poor generous miller who had shared his wealth with the villagers and had fell on hard times. Her father, furious with a poor choice for her to marry him, refused to bestow a dowry (a sum of money or goods) for the couple to start a home and life together with. Word spread throughout the village of the the fathers action that the community banded together and showered the couple with gifts, so a tradition began.
Many brides were not wealthy, nor were their families. Parents of the bride could barely afford to feed the family, and when the announcement of an engagement was presented by the bride-to-be, to the parents, were excited, yet worried. Not enough money was available to pay for a wedding, and in the past women were not actively employed either. Then came the bridal shower. Women, friends and family would than come together to help the bride prepare for the wedding. Sometimes they would offer a wedding dress or small gifts and even money to help the bride-to-be with the wedding planning.
In the United States, stories about these events have been known to originate in Brussels, Belgium around 1860.
In the United States, bridal showers started in urban areas in the 1890's, mainly among the upper class. By the 1930's, bridal showers had spread to rural America.
Many different customs developed in different regions and social groups. The basic shower etiquette has been unchanged for generations. In 1920, an etiquette guide was published suggesting showers be "purely spontaneous and informal" with guests arriving unannounced at the bride-to-be home. In the 1950's, a planning guide was published suggesting more complex themes and games.
In time, bridal shower favors evolved. Bridal shower favors were known in the early days as small decorations and gifts for guests who attend the bridal shower. Favors have come a long way from earlier days to the present. Today, there is a variety of bridal shower favors, from different colors and designs to different styles and themes.
Traditionally, hosting the bridal shower falls on the maid of honor. Gifts are required of those who attend the shower and some consider it rude for a relative of the bride to host it, but relative-hosted showers are a common and accepted occurrence today. A shower normally takes place four to six weeks before the wedding.
